A 'Tail' Of 2 Multanis, 2000 Years Apart

I was taken aback when I heard it. It was a BBC special being shown on National Geographic. Some Brit reporter tracing the route of conquests of Alexander The Great through the Sub-Continent, which is now Pakistan and India.




When Alexander came upon the walled and fortified city of Multan (then the capitol of the Trigarta Kingdom), he ordered his army to scale the walls. But whoever tried, met with stiff resistance from the locals and perished.



So Alexander ordered a ladder to be put up against the wall and he climbed-up himself. As he reached the top and started fighting, a poison arrow struck him between the ribs and pierced his lung. He collapsed and fell back to the ground. There the Multanis pounded on his helmet, his breastplate till the mighty warrior was left cowering against the wall. That was the turning point of his campaign. His wound got infected. He went into shock and his army retreated through the white deserts of Balochistan (Makran today), where he is said to have lost the majority of his men to thirst and hunger.

BaRay beyabro ho kar teray kochay sey hum niklay

This is what the Multani ancestors of Syed Yousuf Raza Gillani did to the superpower of their time, armed with bows and arrows. And look at this Multani today. He probably needs a change of diaper, about now.



John Kerry came swinging down from WA, like Tarzan on a vine. In one blow, he kicked the joint resolution of the parliament onto the trash heap, which was trumpeted out at 2:00AM in the morning after a closed door session that continued for 11 hours straight. The collective will of the people, in the hands of cowards and opportunists, lays waste.



Not only that, Kerry ordered our nincompoop leadership (civilian+military) to hand over the tail section of the stealth chopper that hides the secrets of America's latest technology. This chopper stalled and fell into the Abbottabad compound and was supposedly blown-up by the Seal team. I guess they didn't do such a hot job, since they were in a hurry to get out.



And would you believe it, these bey-ghairat, boot-polishing chamcheys have acquiesced on bended knee ?. Yes, we are not going to study it and make sure we are not taken-in-by-stealth the second time around. No, we can't be bothered to safe-guard our national interests. Kerry will be taking it away with him, to turn around and send it back to attack us, another day. Pehlay aik chamaat, phir doosri chamaat. The cycle-of-capitulations continues.

Will PML-N make any hue and cry about this ?, of course not. All Pakistani leadership (minus Imran Khan) has stored their nest eggs in western capitols. They may be corrupt, spineless, shameless, incompetent, but not stupid enough to do that!.

Hum hain na, to rant and rail against the "Bahadur Shah Zafar"s of our time.

Here is the second leg of Alexander's retreat out of today's Pakistan. At least this is less embarrassing.

Faisal Raza Abidi (PPP) Goes Nuts On Ahmed Raza Kasuri

Sahibzada Ahmed Raza Khan Kasuri's father Nawab Mohammad Khan was murdered. His son fingered Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto (ZAB), leader of the Pakistan People's Party (PPP). The case went up to the Supreme Court of Pakistan and by a verdict of 4-3 Bhutto was convicted and sentenced to death.

Now, 30 odd years later, when nothing is going PPP's way and it's Chairman stands to be indicted in several criminal cases, it has chosen to dig this case out of the ground and is trying to get an acquittal for ZAB from the Supreme Court.



To hash out the particulars of that murder trial, Fariha Idrees got the son of the victim and one of PPP's jiyalas, Faisal Raza Abidi, together on her show. As expected, the young Turk exploded all over the TV screen and blamed the murdered victim's son, for orchestrating the murder of his own father, among a stream of other foul and personal insults which ended in this threat of bodily injury, "Mein ney aik chamaat mara, bahar ja ke giro gay (With one hit of my fist, I can throw you out on the street)".

I wish at the end there, when Faisal Raza Abidi was threatening Ahmed Raza Kasuri (who is a long-time practicing barrister), he could have just smiled and replied, "So what are you gonna do ?, kill me too ?".

Faisal Qureshi & Wife, Mixing Facts & Opinions

What is wrong with this picture ?. Faisal Qureshi is the co-host of the show Karvan, on News One channel with his wife. They had four guests on this particular show. A reporter, a retired Brigadier, a Baloch leader and a PPP representative, N.D. Khan. The topic was Balochistan.



When Faisal Qureshi raised Bhutto's role in the dismemberment of Pakistan in 1971, N.D. Khan the PPP loyalist, of course jumped to defend him. What happened next, you can follow in the video. What Faisal is alleging, may have merit behind it. What N.D. Khan is demanding --that there be a separate panel, with independent guest of stature who should argue Bhutto's role in East Pakistan's secession-- also seems fair. So why does this exchange appear so unseemly ?.

Because N.D. Khan in his advanced age is right, however, he gets clobbered by a young husband-wife duo, who are better actors with larger lungs.

Faisal Qureshi & wife are the hosts, conducting the show. They can ask questions, "Sir! I have the right to ask questions [in a democracy]" as Faisal contends. But as N.D. Khan points out later, Faisal cannot become partisan and fling accusations. Especially, when he loses it and starts casting absolute allegations in the guise of facts. "This is my future which you have ruined!... you have categorically ruined the future of this country...".

These are not opinions. They are stated as facts. Categorical facts.

His wife (bless her heart), hammers the final nail into the coffin. She starts accusing N.D. Khan of not having a "democratic mindset!", since what Faisal just finished saying was "just an opinion!... everybody has an opinion!". When cornered at the end, for flinging accusations, Faisal again retreats behind the safety glass of democracy. "Democracy means I have the right to question!", finger digging into the table and looking around for approval.

Democracy, is not some chador you use to cover up personal bad behavior.

Yes, you can question. But that, is not what you did. You flung personal accusations. You badgered him, slammed your fist onto the glass table, pointed and wagged your finger into the face of an elderly gentleman. All the while wearing that smug, self-satisfied, oh-I-am-so-clever look. You were not only wrong in principle, but also in appearance, manner and tone. And what it did was, shift any sympathies from you, to your guest.

That's why there is only one Talat Hussain in Pakistan. A man who has the gift of weighing situations and intentions. Who can negotiate his way through dangerous waters, political static, baits and rhetoric to arrive at a thoughtful resolution. That not only requires brains (which Faisal has too), but an emotional IQ tuned at the highest frequency.

Faisal & Co. has a lot of work to do, starting with learning how to differentiate fact from opinions. Journalism 101.

Marvi Memom: Will The Real MQM Please Stand Up ?

When I saw the two main Chaudhrys of Punjab, flanking the tiny troll, Farooq Sattar behind a row of mics, in a photo-op designed to show solidarity with a promise of their full co-operation in their areas of influence in Punjab (for reciprocal help in Sindh), I thought the PML-Q had lost their minds, altogether.

Let's cut the BS. MQM is not a political party. As opined by many professionals who have had the unenviable task of managing Karachi, MQM is a mafia. From extortion rackets, hits, shakedowns to assassinations of high profile targets, this outfit does it all. Every member of this organization has to come up with a certain amount of fixed cash to fill up it's coffers. Most of it's high profile leadership have multiple murder cases pending on them.




So it was a breath of fresh air to see Marvi Memon, MNA of PML-Q, take on the MQM rep, Sheikh Salahuddin (MNA) on the Javed Chaudhry show Kal-Tak. Marvi did everything, except pull out his awful hair plugs from his head.

She had some help from the PML-N rep on the show, Engr. Khurram Dastagir, but as usual, she took over the show and set the agenda. She basically laid out the facts:

(1) MQM is not a new party with a clean slate. It is a party with a long checkered history of willing to shake hands with anybody in power, as long as they get their share. (2) Mohajirs were welcomed with open arms by Sindhis in 1947, but their attitude quickly earned them the ire of the locals.(3) MQM has worked to create and fuel ethnic divides, to perpetuate it's rule through the divide-n-rule recipe. (4) MQM has tried to isolate Karachi & Hyderabad from the rest of Sindh, denying local population their rights and opportunities, by design (5) MQM rules by threats, fear and violence to curb dissent and force it's agenda. (6) MQM is lead by a man who is a UK national, who has been living in self-exile for decades, exhorting his followers through long-distance telephonic addresses.

The MQM agent tried his best to dodge, fake and juke these charges, peddling the usual MQM manjan. But he was out-witted and intellectually over-powered by the two PML stalwarts, who gave him no quarter and exposed the lies and hypocrisy.

Punjabi voters, it is said, are forgiving and easily manipulated by slick shysters with forked tongues. Let's hope they still retain the power of sight. See what MQM has brought to the City of Lights in 26 continuous years of being in power: death, destruction, darkness and despair. Is that the kind of future they wish to impart to the future generations of Punjab ?. Like any epidemic, MQM should be quarantined in Karachi and straightened-out here.

Marvi, has set the record straight. Much appreciated.

Faisal Qureshi... Come On Down!*

At this time, "Bang-e-Dara", the program hosted by Faisal Qureshi, is just more of the same. Political conflict and controversy are tossed back and forth, disguised as current affairs and to what end ?. What possible good could come of it ?. We expect this fare from a hack, but not from a highly educated, erudite young man.

In my humble capacity as a viewer, I would like to suggest that Bang-e-Dara be the fountainhead of knowledge that informs and inspires the future generations of Pakistanis.

For instance, invite Dr. Samar Mubarikmand or Dr. Ata-ur-Rehman for in-depth discussions on the various (green) energy resources in Pakistan and how we can best tap them. Dr. Hoodbhoy for how best to institute educational reforms. Sen. Khwaja Asif on the pitfalls of the Rental Power 'Scheme'. There are plenty of experts who could discuss the engineering aspects of infrastructure programs which have become political footballs, like Kalabagh Dam. Similarly, we can discuss Health, Economics, Ecology, Consumer Affairs, etc armed with graphs, charts, maps and Power Point presentations.

These thorny issues and challenges should be explored with experts in the field, one-on-one, with conclusions based upon facts and merit of their arguments. Not political wrestlers who try to showcase the strength of their vocal chords and paucity of grey cells.

In short, you can continue to try and compete with the talking (shouting?) heads, or shift the paradigm of discourse to something meaningful. Something of real value and not just more fluff and static. And who best to do it, than a fellow who is comfortable with science and technology, is aware of his surroundings and has the gift of communication ?.

You are the right man, at the right time and in the right place to play your unique part. Question is, will you do it ?.

(*) "... Come On Down!", is a phrase made popular by Bob Barker

on his longest-running game show on CBS called "The Price Is Right".